Wake. Sing. Sleep. Repeat.

I need a bro right now. Someone who will listen to everything I have to say and not criticize me or make fun of me for it. Someone who actually wants to listen to what I have to say and not just because I asked them to. I used to have bros. We were mad close and I thought that these guys would be my bros forever. What a fucking lie. I realized that all of them all had one other friend within our group who they were really close with. A “best friend” I guess you can say. As I looked at that group I realized that I didn’t have any one person who I was really close with. I tried getting close to them each but they already had a best friend so obviously I couldn’t get close. I did have one friend who I was getting close with and it was going pretty good. Then I found out that he and I both liked the same girl. I wish I could have said to him that he could have her and I would find someone else but I didn’t. We both fought for her for what it seems like to be forever. I could go on about the things that we had to go through but if you want to know then you can ask me in person. But I can tell you that presently I rarely even talk to him anymore. Sure we still act like we are friends with each other but it isn’t even close to what our friendship once was. I don’t know if it will ever be like that again. What makes it worse is that I don’t even like that girl anymore. Because of her I’m stuck in this shit. I wasted a prom on her. Oh yeah I forgot to mention I’m taking this girl to my junior prom. At first I was really happy when she said yes but now I’m looking forward to when the day ends. I can’t believe I let a girl dictate so much of what my life has been like for the past year I guess. My friends and I would always hang out but now I’m never included in those hangouts anymore because the person who is always driving is my friend who fought me for the girl. So now I don’t have any bros. No best friend. I haven’t had any for a while now. And during that whole time my feelings have been bottled up. I’m a time bomb just waiting to explode any second. If you have reached this far and are reading this right now then I would like to say thank you for listening to what I have to say. And don’t reply to this or message me saying “Oh everything will be ok. If you need someone to talk to I’m always here.” unless you really do care. Otherwise you’re just full of shit like everyone else in this world. 

Why is it that I can’t tell anybody all of this shit in my life right now. I fucking hate this.